We are, all of us, in a hole of shit. I mean, I have my own problems, and you have yours, but as a group, things look dark indeed.
Now look, I can write all kinds of gibberish, from warmongering propaganda to articles on high school volleyball to the demons that hound yours truly.
But today, it’s going to touch on - and I’m going to pull straight from my man Jon Stewart on this one - the 2008 cluster-fuck to the White House.
Yes, indeed. The reason for this sort of turnaround, this regression into the basest kind of political discussions? Disgust. Gleeful rage. Insane loathing for the general electorate.
I mean, election politics? Presidential Primaries? Who needs this shit? But it’s true, and it’s right in your face, even if you’re not paying attention. So look around you, Rube. Feel the burn. What are you going to do? The Titanic is going down, Rome is burning and the only swords within your grasp are the feeble power to vote and the ability to be informed if you want it.
If you want it. In some countries it’s mandatory. At least we still have the freedom to deny ourselves the only power we still have left. Ain’t America grand?
I remember once a flatmate of mine in college told me she didn’t vote.
“What?” I implored with confounded rage, as should be expected.
“Yeah, I don’t read the news enough and I don’t feel like I’d make an informed decision. So I don’t vote,” she told me with a look so stolid it made her posture stiffen.
I looked at her in total and complete disbelief and launched into some kind of rant about there being no excuse to not vote, and how others were never given the chance and even others were forced to do it and so on and so on. I don’t know that she listened to me. Thinking back on it, I hope she didn’t.
Had she taken my advice it would only have compounded the problem. America’s issue with voters isn’t just the indifference caused by a large middle class that is too comfortable and therefore too complacent with the status quo. It’s more complicated than that. When you get down to it, there are 3 kinds of voters:
- Those who are easily stirred into action (i.e. swing voters)
- Those who are naive enough to care (some of them are informed enough to be angry)
- Those who are extreme enough in their views to be passionate (dangerous)
The other 55% of the nation doesn’t even show up, so who cares what they think?
Well. It’d be interesting to know what percentage among them fall into the 3 categories of non-voters:
-The responsibly uninformed
-The wholly indifferent
-The informed enough to be angry and too disillusioned to act
I guess there is also the blissfully ignorant and some of these vote as well but they tend to fall into the first category up top. If only the ignorant ones didn’t vote. Then, at least, we’d have a meaningful election (assuming we could trust the counting machines, which we can’t, but that’s another day’s topic). In any case, this does not bode well for the politics of the country. I could get into a whole flurry of why the media is largely to blame since as the 4th branch, they are responsible for informing those who wish to be informed in the first place thereby creating an environment conducive to the principles of a unified and productive democracy… and they’re not doing that. But then it would start sounding like I’m preaching and only a jackass would do that, so what’s the point?
The point, since we’re getting back to it, is that I then told her something I believed in at the time but see now that I didn’t understand entirely. I told her what a lot of people think: that you should always vote.
This is a lie.
The rule is not that you should vote. The rule is that you MUST - without liberty to ignore your duty, without fail to feel the responsibility or the shame to fail - be informed.
After you’re informed you do what you want. Ride a boat upstream into the Congo if you think that’s the right course of action. But for fuck’s sake don’t vote if all you watch is CNN or anything on TV for that matter. Yes “The Daily Show” is included in that; you can’t just watch Jon Stewart. God, I bet he had a fit of fucking desperate terror the first time he realized that he was some people’s sole source of news, and he literally calls it the fake news. Although if you watch both “The Daily Show” AND “The Colbert Report”… well, that’s something…
But seriously, don’t vote if you don’t listen to the radio or read at least 2 or 3 publications, at least one of which is not owned by Rupert Murdoch or Pat Robinson. Don’t vote if you base your decisions on what Oprah or your neighbor says and certainly don’t vote because Mitt Romney thinks you should. Or, just to be safe, anyone from Florida, for that matter.
Deeper and deeper we go.
With the proverbial (and actual) hang-over of the new year steadily gaining distance behind us we’ve turned our attention to more important things like retaining gainful employment, fostering meaningful relationships, maintaining steady exercise and continuing the hunt for new flat mates.
Note that following the presidential primaries is not included.
And why should it be? Everyone else seems content to reiterate over and over a hundred times about the lack of experience this and $400 haircut that, and here is The Anti-Christ. And now, Oh My God how could the Nevada Primary possibly go that way? It’s a wonder there’s any news on at all. And then Heath Ledger goes and takes enough sleeping pills to wreck a pony, and now every female under the age of 50 is lamenting another babe gone down to the party beyond, joining the likes of James Dean and River Phoenix, and possibly one of the Baldwin’s, because, why not? They have enough.
Jeez. Slow down. There’s no call for that kind of thing.
Which is true. It’s too soon for that kind of talk. But no dreamy girl will be wed to ol’ Heath, that’s for sure, unless necrophilia makes a turn for the popular, which I don’t see happening. On no tabloids will pictures of Heath and Matthew McConaughey be shown getting out of shallow beaches, abs brimming with manhood and oodles of charm coming out their pores, sometimes mistaken for talent.
Sometimes. Which is a shame. Dude was beginning to make good films, and sleeping pills on a Hollywood heartthrob? Tragically cliche, no?
But there’s plenty to talk about. And yet, the impression I’m starting to get is that news, at least today, is not what is, but a reflection of what people want to hear. Televised politics, a sport in and of itself, like a perpetual Super bowl that no one pays serious attention to. And that’s terrifying given the education, attention span and critical thinking skills of the typical and average yoke in America. And if something as harmfully unimportant as the democratic presidential primaries steals the thunder of any story bigger than Heath Ledger’s suicide, it’s worrisome.
Which is not to say that Heath Ledger is more news-worthy than the election. Just that when the talking heads have been saying the same thing for 3 days on end and can still blot out a tragic actor’s death, then people must be really yearning for the promise that maybe today CNN will give them some meat.
Because, seriously: politically, these primaries mean nothing. Any democrat will sign the Kyoto Treaty, and not a second too soon. Any one of them would almost certainly refrain from bombing Iran. None of them will start WWIII before tackling immigration, health care and Iraq, and not a single one of those has any chance of being resolved in the next 30 years anyways. So as far as issues go, every candidate is identical. The fools who want Hilary because she’s a woman or Barack because he’s black, or even Edwards because he looks like a sitcom character from the 80’s are wasting time and energy.
Remember: there is nowhere to go but up.
But don’t mind my ranting; I’m disenchanted. I’m informed enough to be angry and foolish enough to care. Statistically, though, you’re probably not all that different from the rest of the electorate, so don’t take any of this personally. Just figure out if you’re one of the majority that forms political opinions based on the fluctuations of your heartbeat when you hear Hilary’s voice or if you’re in the minority that make sense when talking about it. If you’re a voice person, consider working on that. Or consider getting neutered. It’s the same to me.
But what’s certain is that it’s insane to discuss the candidates as if any of it mattered, unless you’re high or drunk, in which case either no one will pay attention to what you’re saying. Either that or else they might just elect you into the White House. Not all that far fetched, when you consider what America has done twice in a row now.
And since the rest of our attention is enthralled with things like doing numerous push ups and running countless kilometers every day, making sure my job isn’t forgotten by the payroll department, paying the rent with people that don’t put me to sleep and fueling the fire of passion even if it’s across the mighty At-a-lantic, it’s not altogether surprising that we might miss something like that. We get so tired of the bullshit that we sometimes can’t filter it from the background noise of stupidity. This too, is terrifying, but alas: reality.
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